One of the assumptions we often make about confidence is that it is something we either have or we don't.
Yet many experienced leaders describe feeling highly confident in some situations and unexpectedly uncertain in others.
A leader may be entirely comfortable leading a school, department or organisation and yet feel hesitant speaking in a room full of peers. Someone else may confidently present to hundreds of people but struggle to have a difficult conversation with a colleague they value.
Confidence is rarely a fixed personal trait. More often, it is shaped by context.
When we view confidence this way, the question changes. Instead of asking, "How can I become more confident?" we begin asking, "What is it about this particular situation that makes confidence harder to access?"
Often the answer lies not in capability, but in meaning. The situation may touch on our identity, our values, our fear of judgement or our desire to do a good job.
Recognising this can be liberating. It allows us to stop viewing moments of uncertainty as evidence that we are not confident enough and instead see them as invitations to better understand ourselves.
Confidence is often less about becoming someone different and more about learning to trust what we already know.
